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So, here’s 14 messages you can stop sending to trans people if you want to be good to the trans community (and possibly get in our pants): 1. But, for myself and my trans friends, it can feel like being treated like an exhibit at the zoo. We look just like men, women, or non-binary people because, well, we are. Like many trans folks, I dream of the world where these questions are no longer a thing. And, there are plenty of ways that we can make sex work for us where our junk configurations don’t need to be an issue.

Are you just looking for brownie points or do you want to put in the work to make sure trans people are safe and treated equally? Congratulating us on how well we line up with cisgender norms of beauty and attractiveness isn’t flattering. Nothing is worse than being asked if we’ve had “the surgery” or told your interest in us is contingent on whether or not we take hormones. Are you interested in people who identify with the gender you do and people who don’t? But, if you consider yourself bi simply because you hook up with trans people who may or may not have the same junk as you, then you need to sit all the way down.

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