(Well, those men in particular, but generally ours.) Though technology has advanced and the internet offers us a smorgasbord of mediums through which to meet people to date, to find love or to have one-night-stands, the platforms don’t teach us anything about romance, love or sex.
Having experienced all the terrible dates above, and understanding the wariness that’s necessary for a woman looking for casual sex, I wasn’t surprised to learn that many women are garnering some of their sexual fulfilment not from real people, but fictional romance or fan fiction.
In fan fiction, women take pop culture characters and existing stories and then invent erotic scenes.
They engage with the material and also rewrite it to fulfil their fantasies and express their desires.
This is not a new phenomenon and these online spaces have enabled women to express their sexuality and fantasies for almost as long as the internet has been accessible to the public.
The awkward, painful, countless silences of those who did not know what to do with themselves without the winking emoji. Before contraception was widely available, the act of sex was perceived as a reliable indicator of (if not a direct path to) your place in the social order.